Strength in the Struggle

I think the Message version says it best:

If you fall to pieces in a crisis,
there wasn't much to you in the first place. (Proverbs 24:10)

I get that adversity makes one stronger.

And obviously, just going back to the simple fact that we our weak in our flesh, real strength is only going to be found in our God.

But something I am beginning to notice in myself is a restless spirit. I often get antsy and automatically my mind goes to the wandering world of what next.

Sometimes I take my heart to that place. That makes it harder to return the land of right now.

And when that adversity card gets pulled, I know its not hard to imagine that the train to that place in my head is boarded and on its way.

That frustrates me about myself. Because all around me, there are some good things taking place too. I'm getting involved in the community in and outside this school. Its exciting, really.

But then there are moments that have me begging for a spirit of compassion. A spirit of understanding. A heart of grace. A mind rooted in truth and not wandering around the what ifs of tomorrow.

I asked myself earlier, "Where is your spirit at ease? When are you calm and not restless?"

I guess I hoped subconsciously my heart would say, "Italy! Africa! Or insert some other unexplored territory..." or "When you're at the beach. When you're with your family. When you're hearing people's stories. When you're creating."

Nope. That didn't happen. I was instead reminded of whom I find my rest in.

But these frustrations? Not the end of the world. Tomorrow is a new day. I can't control other people and what they do and how they live, but I can keep my eyes on the author and finisher of my faith and life.

Quoting a phrase that isn't my favorite but simply applicable to the moment:

It is what it is.